Lost Archives: Enjoying The Last Days Of Spring

Washington, DC, USA

Oh Spring, I will miss you when you go away. The rain, thunderstorms, crazy Starbucks flavours, light jackets & of course the amazing weather. It's not hot so you're not sweating buckets but just perfect enough to take nice long walks. I promised that I will get a little personal in my next blog post & this is that post! So, grab a glass of wine or a cup of coffee & I hope you enjoy this. 

For as long as I can remember I have been a really nice person ( except to boys growing up but what girl wasn't ) I remember I got into my first fight in primary school when a boy thought it was funny to try & bully me. I stood my ground, got punched a few times but also beat the shit out of him as well. My Mum always told me never start fights but if someone put their hands on me then I am allowed to defend myself & let's just say I did. That boys Dad came to the school & spanked his son infront of me for hitting a girl as a way of saying sorry. The second fight I got into was when I was the one who punched the boy in his face for talking about my ( deceased ) Dad. Although I was the one who hit him first my Mum didn't punish me because she understood the struggle of raising kids as a widow. Since then that's when things turned a little dark for me. 

I was jealous of all my friends ( when I moved to the states ) that had Dads. Being the middle of 5 kids is hard & I wanted to be seen. I started lashing out at home & in school just so that I can get my Mums attention. It was hard. I felt lonely. I had 2 older sisters who didn't want to include me in anything & 2 younger siblings I was to old to hangout with. My household was complicated & to fill that void I tried my hardest to make friends. Throughout the years I have realized that friends do NOT last. I was the one that would go out of my way to try & keep friends even though they were using me & making me feel like crap but when I needed to run away from my problems at home, I could turn to them. 

With that I have made peace with how my life turned out right now. I feel like I am in a better place. So, I want to say thank you for all of your continuous support! 


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